Pete's Mighty Morphin Power Rankings

MLB Power Rankings Segment Script

Alright, let's check the power rankings against last week — and folks, there's some real chaos to get to.

Big League Balls (1–5)

The Brewers take over #1 from the Dodgers, who slide two spots to #3 despite acquiring the almighty Skubal. Turns out a five-game skid outweighs a great record, even for the defending champs. The Braves climb to #2 on a six-game streak, Rays hold at #4, and the Cubs sneak up to #5.

Warning Track Balls (6–10)

The Red Sox jump two spots to #6 — riding six straight and Craig Breslow now looks like a genius (an evil genius?). The Yankees slide to #7 as their bats go cold but they picked up two new bats so... The real story is the fighting Mason Millers in San Diego — up TEN spots to #9, from #19 last week, on one of the hottest stretches in the league.

Ground Balls (11–15)

Houston climbs five spots to #12 with Triple Crown eligible Yordan Alvarez, and Miami jumps seven spots into #13 despite unloading their talent. Detroit and St. Louis both tick up a spot. Are the Tigers better without Skubal?

Foul Balls (16–20)

Cleveland drops five spots to #18 — all those deadline additions still can't buy a win. Baltimore climbs four spots to #19. And Pittsburgh craters eight spots to #20 — cold bats, a fading record, and they just released Marcell Ozuna. How much longer will Skenes be there?

Dead Balls (21–30)

And here's the headline: Washington was #10 last week. This week? #27. Seventeen spots in one week — a seven-game losing streak will humble anybody. The A's stay parked at dead last but no one is there to watch them anyways..

Tell us who's too high, who's too low, and which team's about to blow up next week's rankings. ⚾🔥